ToySECT - Action Figure and Toy Review - 003 Emperor's Royal Guard - Star Wars Black Series

Hello and welcome back to ToySECT! Third time is the charm! Here's the new Star Wars Black Series 6" Emperor's Royal Guard action figure that was first introduced in 1983's The Return of the Jedi.

So, here's another of the Empire's faceless subjects. He must of done something right, if he worked his way up to what is basically the Secret Service. Let's give him a name, shall we? I'll call him Carl. Carl worked in Logistics. Carl was a go getter. Carl was the kind of guy who showed up 15 minutes early and stayed a half hour late on the job, skipping lunch to review his reports and what not. One day while going over the new construction project, Carl realizes he can save the company money by removing all the safety railings in the laser department. Bam! Carl is now on his way up the Imperial ladder. 


Woohoo!

What we could've gotten with 'ol Carl here is a helmet with a napkin and toothpick, but hasbro went the extra mile and gave our guy a nifty set of Rick James boots with some fancy paintball gear for all those company outings. These guys had it made. All they did in the movie was just stand there. With swivel and bend wrists and his new rockin' ankles, Carl is ready for some action! A holster for his little blaster is also a perk for his position, as the Empire doesn't allow pockets of any kind. He has to bring one of those clear backpacks with him to work so the check officers can make sure he's not taking the Imperial pen's or toilet paper home at night. 













D'ohs!

Workin' for man has it's downsides as well. Can you imagine just standing there for hours in a full set of armor with robes on top of that? The helmet doesn't even have breathe holes for cryin' out loud. Carl's down to a buck o' five after a few shifts of "sweating with the oldie" under his belt. No wonder his joints are all rubbery. He's not the easiest man to find either. Every time the boss has a meeting he and his co-worker Paul get sent out of the room. Now they're having a "talk" with the assistant manager and some kid wearing one glove. Probably just a dress code violation. What's the worst that can happen?





What If...


Well, we haven't seen much of Carl lately. After the company went under his position was gone and there's not many other emperor types who need a guardin' so to speak. Last I heard he was going back to school to finish up that Fine Art's degree. I'm sure we haven't seen the last of him yet. Maybe he'll show back up some day doing drawings on his computer or writing a blog about his action figure collection.

Finish Him!

I'm starting to dig this guy. He's kinda' the silent type but man is he colorful. Want to get him talking? Ask him about how it was like to work at Venture, or what was his favorite Benny Hill episode. I give him 4 out of 5 TPS reports. Just don't wait until the end of his shift on Friday to fire him.